It's interesting--I was just speaking briefly with a friend about "being as harmless as doves but wise as serpents" this weekend. I think it's doing as little harm to others as possible, but not allowing anyone to take advantage of or walk all over you. It challenges the binary thinking we tend to have and encourages us to take up the complexity we have as living beings, and living beings with so much creative agency over who we choose to be and move in the world. We can move with peace and love, but be smart about it. We don't have to endure unkind treatment.
Thanks for sharing these wonderful insights Mari. Yes, we live in a society that struggles with complexity and the non-binary. I love the thought that 'we can move with peace and love, but be smart about it. We don't have to endure unkind treatment.'
Thank you so much Gabriela. I love been led by the writing process and the larger insights that arise. Wishing you well channelling your own inner Lilith! ;)
I didn't know about Lilith so thank you for this as I am now intrigued!
Some exciting writing prompts to get into but also on this, "What are the individual and collective consequences of fitting in at the expense of our needs?"
I am not sure I can do this question justice here, but IMHO the individual consequence is (heartbreakingly), one I see on almost a daily basis in my work. So many of us have been primed from childhood to fit in, driven by biological wiring, deep in the brain and the nervous system, we're mammals so utterly dependent at birth that this safety mechanism dictates very early on whether we simply live or die. We'll do pretty much anything to remain attached to our caregivers and our tribe. We will absolutely learn that we can abandon ourselves and our needs if it means we can stay in the fold. Attachment will trump Authenticity and herein lies the root of the need to fit-in and to belong. In the short term this is simply about survival. But in the longer term, and collectively, the price we pay for people-pleasing and not being who we really are is at the root of so many chronic health issues and sets us up to live a life that doesn't feel our own. The cost to us, individually and collectively is beyond comprehension; it hits us in every slice of life. We can adapt and still "get through" life but we are deeply unhappy when we can't fulfil the spaces in life that are our birthright. Being too nice and fitting-in causes a deep fissure between who we think we should be and who we really are; this tug of war deeply impacts our biology and the cost to remaining attached or fitting in, however we frame it, is far too high. The physiological response from the body-mind is often catastrophic. I have so much to say on this but I won't continue to hog your comments!
It's interesting--I was just speaking briefly with a friend about "being as harmless as doves but wise as serpents" this weekend. I think it's doing as little harm to others as possible, but not allowing anyone to take advantage of or walk all over you. It challenges the binary thinking we tend to have and encourages us to take up the complexity we have as living beings, and living beings with so much creative agency over who we choose to be and move in the world. We can move with peace and love, but be smart about it. We don't have to endure unkind treatment.
Thanks for sharing these wonderful insights Mari. Yes, we live in a society that struggles with complexity and the non-binary. I love the thought that 'we can move with peace and love, but be smart about it. We don't have to endure unkind treatment.'
This was so cool. I loved how you wove the dream into the larger picture and gave all those reflections on Lilith. Beautifully read.
Wow! How have I gone through so many years of exploring the Way of the Goddess, depth psychology and Christianity and never heard of Lilith before?
She's a really interesting character! If you're interested, you can find out more about her in Lisa Marchiano's book
https://lisamarchiano.com/
Thank you so much Gabriela. I love been led by the writing process and the larger insights that arise. Wishing you well channelling your own inner Lilith! ;)
I didn't know about Lilith so thank you for this as I am now intrigued!
Some exciting writing prompts to get into but also on this, "What are the individual and collective consequences of fitting in at the expense of our needs?"
I am not sure I can do this question justice here, but IMHO the individual consequence is (heartbreakingly), one I see on almost a daily basis in my work. So many of us have been primed from childhood to fit in, driven by biological wiring, deep in the brain and the nervous system, we're mammals so utterly dependent at birth that this safety mechanism dictates very early on whether we simply live or die. We'll do pretty much anything to remain attached to our caregivers and our tribe. We will absolutely learn that we can abandon ourselves and our needs if it means we can stay in the fold. Attachment will trump Authenticity and herein lies the root of the need to fit-in and to belong. In the short term this is simply about survival. But in the longer term, and collectively, the price we pay for people-pleasing and not being who we really are is at the root of so many chronic health issues and sets us up to live a life that doesn't feel our own. The cost to us, individually and collectively is beyond comprehension; it hits us in every slice of life. We can adapt and still "get through" life but we are deeply unhappy when we can't fulfil the spaces in life that are our birthright. Being too nice and fitting-in causes a deep fissure between who we think we should be and who we really are; this tug of war deeply impacts our biology and the cost to remaining attached or fitting in, however we frame it, is far too high. The physiological response from the body-mind is often catastrophic. I have so much to say on this but I won't continue to hog your comments!